A SANDWICH FOR SUSTAINABLE RELATIONSHIPS

My story today is about the sustainability of relationships. After slightly more than two years with Grain SA, I believe that I have spent enough hours in meetings and discussions with members to venture an opinion on this matter.

According to my diary, I spend more than 20 hours per week in directors', working groups and other meetings. The story of the sandwich is about the so-called soft skills of Grain SA members. How skilled are we when it comes to our relationships with other people?

Producers are definitely known more for their task orientation than people orientation. I myself am also much more inclined to focus on the job rather than the person. I regularly receive advice and admonitions from the people closest to me to be more balanced. It is not an easy matter. However, with a whole cabinet full of "pain files" and years of practice, I now find it much easier to not only focus on the task at hand, but to also notice the person behind the job.

To motivate people in your team and your family, one sometimes have to apply various methods.

Some days a short remark, like "Oh no, you can do much better!" is sufficient to prompt a person to perform at much higher levels. Then there are those days that are known to my wife and me as: "sit-downfirst-and-play-along-a-while" days, before you put the real issue on the table. Another name for it is the "sandwich approach".

As soon as she says to me: "Remember the sandwich", I know that I will first have to start with something positive before I can get to the meat of the matter; and then I also have to close with something soft. I do not know about you, but try it!

I apply this approach by telephone, via email and in personal discussions, especially when things get a bit hot. The result is simply astounding! A cross email without a name or a greeting is just a thick, tough piece of meat (which stinks) that demotivates most people (except of course hyenas that flourish on it). I, however, never miss the meat in the middle, believe me! The bread on the sides help to build better relationships resulting in less cabinets and archives full of "pain files" that have to be kept.

The motivation of our people at all levels of society depends on your leadership style and soft skills levels. Grain SA and its members are a small family and the manner in which we interact with one another and support each other, determine our sustainability as an organisation. Therefore, next time you wish to admonish someone or encourage through positive criticism, think about the sandwich of sustainable relationships.

I close with the story told by someone of the father who got on the train with two very young children. The kids were naughty; clambering all over, bumping into other passengers and just being difficult. The father just did nothing until somebody could not take it anymore and asked the man to call his kids to order and discipline them. His reply was apologetic, explaining that they have only just come from the hospital where their mother had passed away just now.

Why don't you therefore try the sandwich approach next time before you perhaps have to eat a tough piece of steak yourself!

Jannie de Villiers, CEO